Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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