Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
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I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
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Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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