i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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