omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
