Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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