I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
