I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
