I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
