Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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