Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
