Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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