I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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