So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize