dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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