Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
i think im in europe. pls send help
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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