**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
There r osticjed everywhere
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
