Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
