BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize