hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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