Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
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