shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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