Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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