I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
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Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
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I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
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