yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
