Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
