Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
