hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
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