I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
