Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize