he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I think we might need a safe word for this...
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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