Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
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