Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
