Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
