Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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