I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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