Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize