I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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