I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
