I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
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