I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
We were destined to go to rehab together
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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