Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
time to smoke my breakfast
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
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