He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Randomize