ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
