it was like having sex with a tree stump
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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