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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.

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• (310): View more from California

  I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one

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• (940): View more from Texas

  My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!

  (940): View more from Texas

  HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs

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• (252): View more from North Carolina

  You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.

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• (952): View more from Minnesota

  How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Come to this bar

  (1-512): View more from Texas

  But I'm full of food.

  (512): View more from Texas

  MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO

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