Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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