Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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