Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
