wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
My balls are so social today.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
