haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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